No, despite what your eyes may be telling you, the dark squiggles gracing these masterpieces are not bats or slugs. They are immaculately coiffured moustaches, worthy of the finest 19th century gymnast and 1920s bounder. More importantly, since ‘taches are for some strange reason not currently enjoying a great deal of traction outside the world of hipsterdom and Movember, these cheeky chaps allow those of you who secretly yearn for unrestrained, year-round top lip hair growth to indulge in an aspirational fashion statement. Actually make that an inspirational fashion statement too. Wearing your ‘tache on your feet is a more flexible, Footloose approach to facial hair, and inclusive too – we welcome all women who secretly harbour hairy ambitions to indulge in these too.